Re-Focusing

so i've been re-focusing my life lately, especially these past few days. there are some personal things that are going on that i'm really struggling w/ and stressed about. i haven't been sleeping well and i've slowly been losing my appetite (which is almost the part that scares/worries me the most). there seems to be so much drama going on right now that i'm stuck in the middle of, and i don't know what to do. it makes it so much harder when this drama involved guys and some of my close friends. i just don't know what to do - i'm hurting one person while liking another, yet i don't know what that other person thinks. to add a fun mix to this whole situation, a good friend of mine also likes this other person. why does this have to turn in to some twisted, messed up, triangle/odd shaped configuration? i almost laugh at myself for getting this involved in this whole situation - i feel so petty going through this. am i back in middle school? no! i feel like i should be more mature and "adult" about this whole thing. i feel that i should act like a mature adult would in this type of situation, but then i feel that i can't act that way b/c a mature adult wouldn't be in this situaiton in the first place! i feel that mature adults don't have little crushes like this and petty arguments that seem rediculous the moment they begin. yet it seems to be so difficult to get out of this mess. there are bigger problems in this world - and i'm stressing about who likes who and what not?! for real! what has this come to?!? i need to re-focus my life and thoughts on God and what his will and plan are for my life. i need him at the center, the first One i run to no matter what. he needs to be my first and main priority in everything i do. i've slipped from that yet again, but i'm picking up my cross daily and stating that "yes, i do follow Him and i will do everything in my human power to please him and give him the glory, no matter what the cost".
i am a daughter of the most high King; i am a princess; i am chosen by name; i am a royal priesthood; i am victorious; i am strong; i am a conquerer; i am beloved; i am above and not below; i am the head and not the tail; i am the first and not the last; i am a winner and not a loser; i am beautiful. Praise God for who i am and for Who's i am. nothing can be greater than that. Thank you Lord, for making me me.
"you make everything glorious, and i am your's; what does that make me?" GLORIOUS AND BEAUTIFUL!
Jai Jeeshu - "victory in Jesus" (Hindi)

so here we go..... another blog for me. i'm really just starting this right now so that i can keep up w/ family. =)
it's late/early right now though, so i'm not going to post some huge, deep, discussion starting thought - plus i might not do that often anyway, so i'm not going to start now! =)
more to come...